The space that’s in between insane and insecure.

I’m pretty sure a great majority of Green Day’s songs were written just for me. Remember when I was obsessed with Green Day, Dayra? You were sooo upset. You wanted me to like Sugarcult. I still don’t know why.

Anyways, for anyone who doesn’t know, I have a boyfriend now. His name is Kenny, and he makes me happy. And that is about all you people need to know. Although, I am kinda bothered by the lack of support from people that should support me.

I don’t know, I have a lot of things on my mind. People change and places change and thoughts and ideas and dreams and goals. Like, lets be real. I came to Texas A&M with 2 of my good friends. We spent everyday together in high school. Ruben, I see about twice a semester. And usually only when Dayra comes. Elora, we attempted. First semester we saw each other quite a bit. But honestly, she made new friends and so did I. We are still good friends, but we have new interests, new friends, new hobbies. I’m not upset, but stuff happens, you know?

And then there are my new friends. Most notably, Sarah. She is a really good person and we have really bonded. I’m there for her and she for me. I can tell her anything and I know she will give me the best advice she possibly can. From her I met Kaylie, her roommate. Another really nice, genuine person. Then there’s Hunter, Fredy, Kate, Sarah T, and Tiffany. The Macy’s clan. We really bonded at a party recently. I truly like those people. They are fun to be around and I can easily talk to all of them. And finally Kenny. Although this deviates from my snippyness at the beginning of this post, maybe I can say a bit about him. I really didn’t expect to get into a relationship so soon. But like I stated, sometimes things just happen. I like that we can just sit here and talk for hours. And that we can go out and have a good time with and without alcohol. I like, no matter how much I say I don’t, the way he looks at me. Like I’m the most fascinating person in the world.   From him, I have met quite a few people. I can’t really call them my friends yet, because they’re not. They’re his friends. But I know that this will change because he is forcing me to hang out with them. (Kidding! I enjoy it.) They are a really nice group of guys, and pretty funny too. Although I am terrified of being trapped in a beach house with ALL of them during Spring Break, I am also very excited.

What else has changed? I feel like I’m talking to myself with this post. I mean, I guess I have changed. If high school me saw college me, I don’t know how I would feel. I still have my morals. I know what I will and won’t do. But that’s all I do know. I don’t know if BIMS is for me. I don’t know how the hell I’m going to pass chemistry and math. And I don’t know where I am going to get all the damn money I need to live here. But I mean, I can think of this 1 of 2 ways. I can be all stressy and anxiousy, and worry like all day. OR, I can think of this as an exciting, unknown adventure. I’m gonna go with option 2, cause when I come out of all of this on top, then I will feel amazing.